


Zulaport

by longjensilver



Category: Magic: The Gathering (Card Game)
Genre: Alcohol, Book: Zendikar: In the Teeth of Akoum, Zendikar (Magic: The Gathering)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-21
Updated: 2021-02-21
Packaged: 2021-03-18 19:36:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,172
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29614401
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/longjensilver/pseuds/longjensilver
Summary: Nissa has a lot to learn about being thrown out of bars in style.
Comments: 1
Kudos: 2





	Zulaport

**Author's Note:**

> I really loved the potential in the Zulaport scene in Teeth, and wanted to try a different take on it. Cheers!

Nissa had never seen anything like the Zulaport tavern. The elves had festivals many times per year, and this was all  _ certainly _ festive, but probably not the same.

“What are they all celebrating?” she asked. She could barely hear herself over the ruckus.

Anowon laughed and handed her an awful-smelling pint of...something or other. “Celebrating? They’re probably celebrating the end of another day. I’m going to as well, while I still can.” He tapped his metal mug against hers. “Cheers.”

“Alright. Cheers?” she said, and Anowon tossed down his drink. Nissa followed, and realized her mistake--she doubled over in her chair, coughing, and saw that Anowon hadn’t drinken anything at all. He wheezed with laughter.

“People drink this on purpose?” Nissa asked, swishing what remained of her swill.

“Correct. And the food’s even worse.” He took a cautious drink from his mug and cleared his throat.

Nissa wasn’t sure why, but she laughed until her head hurt. “I can’t believe all of this is...way out here. Are all of these people criminals?” she asked. Her numb tongue made it hard to talk.

Anowon shrugged. “What respectable person would come this far?”

“Us?” Nissa said. Against her better judgement, she took the last sip of her drink.

“Are we not here to steal supplies and a boat?” Anowon asked.

“That’s not the same. We need a boat to reach Akoum. Our mission is more important than tomorrow’s haul of fish.”

“Is that so? I doubt the fishermen would agree. Have you tried, ‘I’m only taking your money because we’re saving the world,’ or ‘I’m only slitting your throat because otherwise I’ll starve--’”

“Stop it,” Nissa sighed. She was surprised to see a look of regret cross his face.

“All I mean to say is, no one’s going to thank you when this is all finished. People like us don’t get to be heroes, even if we succeed,” he said. Nissa had to lean in to hear him over the noise. “You’ll just be a boat thief, in the end.”

“We  _ will _ succeed. And I don’t want to be a hero.” She looked down into her empty cup and stood. “I want another one of these.”

“That’s not a good idea,” Anowon called after her, but she was already halfway to the bar. Had the floor been slanted when they came in?

She tapped on the wooden counter. “Excuse me! Whatever your name was! I’d like another one of these.” The portly man at the tap simply ignored her. Maybe he couldn’t understand her with his human hearing.

She nearly jumped out of her skin when Anowon tapped her on the shoulder and leaned against the counter. “Hey!” he shouted. “Is elf money not good here? We want another round!”

The bartender turned and gave them a weary look that slowly turned to anger. “I know that voice.”

“I thought you might,” Anowon sighed.

“You! I thought Indorel threw you out?” the bartender huffed.

“And I thought you served ale here. I guess we were both wrong,” Anowon said, and spun a large, shiny coin between his nails. The human’s eyes grew wide, and when he reached for the coin, it disappeared into Anowon’s empty palm. A sleight of hand trick. “We’d like another round. Do you have anything better than this piss?”

The bartender grumbled something but still poured their drinks before shuffling on. “Do you know him?” Nissa asked.

“More or less. Everyone here works for Indorel, the local crime boss. But truly, they work for money. And that coin was more than he’s seen all week,” Anowon explained.

“Where did you get that? Is that Tajuru gold?” Nissa asked. Had he been carrying money this whole time?

Anowon tilted his head toward a table in the back of the filthy room. “A generous donation from our friend over there.”

“You stole it! When?” Nissa hissed. The table’s human occupant was slumped forward in a drunken stupor, his spilled drink still dripping onto his boots. Nissa noticed the shape of plate armor under his leather coat.

“Just a moment ago. Now, where do you think someone like that got an elven coin?” Anowon whispered. “An easy mark like that is lucky to be alive. You’d be doing him a favor by  _ liberating _ the rest of his loot before a cutthroat does.”

It wasn’t a completely sound argument, morally...but Nissa was very hungry, and she’d seen someone order soup. “What if he wakes up?” she asked.

“He won’t, and I’ll show you what to do. Just try not to fall over,” Anowon said.

She took a brave gulp of ale and slammed it on the bar with a splash. “Alright. Let’s do it.”

****

This place was amazing, and Nissa felt great after her victory...and a few more drinks. She mumbled that into Anowon’s shoulder just to make sure he knew, and tried to stand up. When she nearly toppled to the floor, he pulled her back into her chair, and she laughed until she felt sick. He was such a nice person. And good at sailor songs. He had been softly singing in between Nissa pestering him.

“ _ Once more we sail with a northerly gale to the ice and wind and rain, _

_ Them coconut fronds, them tropical lands, we soon shall see again; _

_ Our stuns’l booms is carried away, what care we for that sound? _

_ A living gale is after us, thank the gods we’re homeward bound.” _

“Hey,” she said, and put both hands on his face, “You are a good friend. I liked your song. Did you know you’re my best friend, I think?”

“You’re drunk,” he sighed.

“I’m not! But _ you _ look terrible!” she said, and held on to his face so she wouldn’t float away. “Why? Because of me?”

“Stop that,” he said, and put an arm around her so she couldn’t move or fall over. “I’m tired. You’re just drunk.”

“Is it ‘cause of Sorin? I think I figured it out.” Nissa said.

“Did you really?” Anowon sighed. “Somehow I doubt that.”

“’Ave you noticed the Roil following him? Isn’t it getting worse? He doesn’t know...that I saw it. Under the mountain,” Nissa rambled, and then laughed.

Anowon gave her a strange look that she couldn’t quite interpret. “That was almost lucid. What did you see?”

“I saw...that...he’s not very nice to you. I should do something about that. I should kick his ass,” she said.

“No, that’s not what you were talking about. What did you see under the mountain? Come on, you had it for just a second!” Anowon insisted.

“Had what--?”

At that moment, something--some _ one _ \--toppled down the stairs from the inn above, with a very angry silhouette standing over him. They both yelled in a language Nissa didn’t understand. She gave the man who’d been kicked down the stairs a dopey wave as he stood up and brushed off his black coat. “Look, I found Sorin,” she whispered.

Anowon groaned. “I should close our tab...”


End file.
